The imploding of an American Dream

I've been feeling disillusioned lately. Well, really for awhile. For a couple of years actually. In terms of what is supposed to be the American Dream I don't think I fit into, nor do I think I want to obtain it. In terms of what is considered American I don't think I fit into, nor do I think I want to obtain it. In terms of mass materialism I don't think I fit into, nor do I think I want to ever obtain it or worship at the alter known as "The Label."
I never want to say, that a $5,000 purse is affordable or that the latest model of SUV is a must-have.

I've never made getting married or having kids a goal, nor do I ever plan to. I don't understand how marriage and kids can be a goal. I think they can be a want perhaps a need, (meaning in terms of biological clock) but never a goal. Do you want to be a parent or do you want to have kids? Do you want to be a husband or a wife and have a marriage or do you want to be a bride or a groom and have a wedding?
Last week when speaking with two soon-to-be-grooms I told them I don't want to spend more than $1500 on my wedding and that $1400 of that had better be on food and alcohol. I thought I was going to have to pick their eyes up off the floor. They said that was all fine and well, but I'm forgetting about a little thing like the dress and the tuxes. To which I replied, I'm pretty sure I could find a white dress at Target that would do just fine and if he wants to wear a tux, great, but it didn't really matter to me at all. I don't want a wedding, I want a marriage. Both of the soon-to-be's said they were at upwards of $15,000 for their (the brides) big day. I can't articulate how obscene that is to me. But, to each their own. Starving children or education for schools, $2,000 on a cake or $2,000 on books and clean water it's a choice. I guess.

But, this is simply one thing that I have issue with, the whole mass conspicuous consumption and waste that comes with a imagined disposable income, because isn't that what most of us have, an imagined income? We are living one way when we should be living another. A nation of mass debt and dreamed of necessities. SUV's that guzzle gas fueling the need for foreign oil and causing drivers to create intimidation on the road. Hummers were made for warfare not for soccer practice or pizza deliveries. Not to mention how frustrating it is to be inside my Mustang and try to back-out of a parking spot next to two Denalis on either side of me, which causes me to worry about being rear-ended.

Our homes are nothing more than a different shade of beige in a 2.5 McHouse society with a Playskol set that is remarkably never used. The different shade of beige has a three car garage, which allows the owner to never be seen or heard by the other beige neighbors. The SUV can be parked quickly and quietly inside the comfort of the home and thus showing the prominence of what we truly value, our cars, and the garage has become our new fence. Yet there is still a need for a fence around the different shade of beige and the remarkably never used Playskol set allowing for double protection from ever having to see or know our neighbors in the perfect Wonder Bread White suburbia McNeighborhood. Perfect.

We consume pre-made pre-packaged foods with more additives and preservatives than anyone could ever pronounce all cooked in the quick convenience of our microwaves. We consume the food within a 10 minute time frame and yet we wonder why we are obese, we wonder why every other person is suffering from heart disease and diabetes and various cancers somehow remain a mystery to us.

We value fame over substance. We want our facts in five second sound-bites and we consider ourselves informed. We believe the stupid-box is the alter of our living rooms and have all of our furniture pointed towards the glowing god. We don't have time to know the full article and believe what-ever the government wants us to know and we don't argue, fight, or have time to question because we don't have the time or worst of all, we no longer care and we don't believe that we can make a difference. There was a time when the status quo was measured by the Jones it is now measured by the Hilton's. We are trying to keep up with the unkeepable and the unattainable all with a PR driven image that bears no relevance to substance what-so-ever.
We want material items because we think that will give us substance. It's about the label and what the label represents and how it will represent us to those around us; what the perceived perception of us will be to the people we don't know and who we don't have the time to know.
We want to know what knowing and being associated with a person can do for us and gain us in the long run, yet we don't have time to really get to know anyone beyond that. People have, in a way, become the new label, the new perception.

We are more connected than ever, yet have never been more disconnected from those around us. There are days were I am starved for real and actual intellectual conversation. I'm tired of asking how someone is and only being answered with one word replies of "busy" or "tired." That's a status report that's not a conversation. What happened to adjectives, verbs, and nouns when having a conversation? When someone tells us something personal we label it as TMI, when really, it's not, we have simply become too distant, too busy, too lazy to care. We spend all day IM'ing in abbreviations and call it conversation.
People are looking for a quick fix and an instant result, yet they aren't willing to put the time and effort into it. We want someone else to "fix" us. What happened to spending time alone and thinking, spending some time alone in quiet? Quiet time without the stupid box on all the time? What has happened to connections and friendships and relationships and spending real time with someone? What is happening to all of us? We are constantly going, going, going...but where are we all headed?