Wednesday, March 19, 2008

the power of one

After deleting three different titles to this post, I decided to just write it out here.
The power to both pick-up the phone when it rings and the power to dial the phone. I know, not Earth shattering things, but when you've dated and been hurt (crushed) as much as I have, well, those can be kinda big deals.
As the phone dialer, it takes courage to punch the numbers. As the receiver of the call, it takes courage to not screen and actually pick-up the phone. Again, not changing the world here, but possibly changing the world of one.

Yep. If you haven't already figured it out, I've started dating someone. Still pretty new. (about three weeks) (and if history has taught me anything, admit I am dating someone on the blog and dating someone will end, so.)(but I hope that curse can be broken.) Still new enough that I am trying to not revert back to old habits of sabotage. Not doing so well on that front, as Monday (ala, St. Pat's) I went home with a guy I met that night, after flirting with my guy friends all night, and while dating the formerly mentioned man. Not proud of that moment, but it happened and I didn't do anything morally wrong, maybe just stupid, but not wrong. Issues, who has issues? Get your issues, here!

Last night the dating man, we shall call him, Math Teacher, and I just told each other that we liked each other and that this is a pressure free situation. (Cue sappy music.)
Math Teacher also knocked me on my ass last night (no slap, just a knock) when he told me I am "very guarded...he hasn't figured out why yet, but I am." Ah, yep. Amazing how one sentence can knock the wind from me. I told him I had been hurt a lot and there is time for him to figure it out if he is patient. So. We shall see. (cue, music)(again.)

So, anyway, this week it's about the power of being able to pick-up the phone, maybe make a drunk dial or two, ask someone out, tell them that I like them (sad, but that's kinda a big deal for me. I know, sad.) and to have the courage to not be the cat-lady. Cause, it is a short line between being a happy-go-lucky single gal to being the woman who is bitter and owns at least three cats. Let's just be honest about that. It's about having the courage to not become the cat-lady.


Tom Serafini, Actor to the Stars! said...

Knowing your history (from these pages) did you not think you were a guarding type?

Here's to happiness! Yours I mean.

GirlGoyle said...

I wouldn't worry about being the cat lady cuz lady....there isn't a feline bone in that body! You'll eventually find someone that can keep up with you. It's just a matter of not fretting it.

Brody said...

Good luck with this one :)

Party Girl said...

Tom: Oh, no. Walls, I got 'em, I just like to believe I can hide them. I like to think I hide them well.

I know, I'm hilarious.

GG: Thanks. Me no likey the cats.

Brody: Yah, I like the Math Teacher, he's different in some pretty good ways.

Now, how not to fuck it up.

ptg said...

Well, you could always be the sexy CatWoman with the leather outfit - that should spice some things up. ;o) LOL Hey - but good for you for at least trying to break the cycle. Keep us updated, cuz you know we're all pulling for you!

limpy99 said...

My brother's girlfriend is a cat lady. She's got at least 4. And works in a bar, has a phenomenal body, cooks wicked good soup, has a great garden, and

Wait, why is she dating my brother?

Anyway, the point is, it could be worse than being the cat lady.

Party Girl said...

ptg: thanks, glad to know I have peeps to back me up.

Limpy: I meant more of the 80 year-old bitter cat lady type, not the hot, bartender earthy hot type. Hell,if she gets tired of your brother, send her my way.

Blues Greene said...

I'm pulling for yo too, but here's what I want to know. If you're feeling particularly vulnerable from past experiences/relationships, it might not be wise to put that out right away. Take a step back and let things happen or not. You strike me a someone with great contradictions (that's wonderful, I identify with that) well read, introspective, aware, deep thinker, You write extremely well. Yet you define yourself, in part, by sex and alcohol. There is so much more. I know you know that. Just a thought.

AeroAangel said...

yeah, when you've already got two cats, and more than a dozen broken hearted times in your life...that is the fear