Monday, June 11, 2007

I's got nothing

Or at least I feel like I have nothing to write about, hence the lack of writing.
Or, maybe I have too much to write about and I don't feel like taking the time to write it all out and explain.
I dunno.
It's definitely one of those.
So. I will give the Cliff notes version of what's up, what's new, what's old, and what's just generally been happening. Or not happening. That's for you to decide.

My "friend" Nick and I no longer talk to each other. Since my birthday disaster cry-fest where I was yelled at and belittled he never apologized nor has he tried to make contact with me. I called him after the incident and we talked for about 2.4 minutes. It is really interesting to see who your friends are in the end.

I finally downloaded the last of my pictures onto flickr. I hope to have the rest of Mykonos and NYC up for you all by the end of the week.

Because I know you're dying to see them.

Since returning from Greece I've been in a funk. Understandable, but blech.

I always knew I wanted to travel, but now I know that it is a need. I need to travel. It is a part of me. It is in me. It is not a want, but a need.

Therefore, I booked a trip to Budapest. I will be there the week of Thanksgiving. I booked it last week.

Mama was not thrilled about that news when I told her last night.

She'll get over it. Slowly, but she will.

The reason she wasn't happy is that her daughter (a.k.a. her only daughter. Her baby girl.) is moving away, thus the news that I wouldn't be home for a major holiday was not welcomed.

I go to my grad school interview with the director of the Public Policy program on Friday. Hopefully by then everything will be finalized and I can start to apply for housing and jobs.

I applied for scholarships and also tuition stipends. Cross fingers, pray to the gods, that those come through for me.

Because I have enough debt.

Between this job being over and grad school starting I will have less than two weeks to move, find a job, and start grad school.

That could be stressful if I let it be.

I am trying really hard not to let it be.

I really wish I wasn't taking classes this summer.

I am uberly burnt out on classes.

But I told them I would.

So. I am.

Although I love my job and the people I interact with everyday, it has become painfully obvious it is time to move on.

So, I am glad the job didn't come through for me.

Life is funny how it works out.

I've been getting regular updates from Mr. London.

I both love his emails.

And hate his emails.

I love hearing from him.

I hate that he loves it there.

This too shall pass.

(That I hate that he loves it there.)

After grad school I plan to join the Peace Corps.

Get back to me in two years, though. My life changes too quickly to really make that a firm commit.

After the 27 month minimum commitment I plan to work for the Peace Corps and eventually start my own organization.

I want to start an organization for women. Teaching them a trade or showing women that the skills they already have can make an income for themselves and for their families.

With the skills and income I hope to show that they then are a valuable contributor to the community and a vital part of the world and to their families, thus they are worth more than the cow on the hierarchy ladder.

I also would like to change the media images and messages women are shown and given here in the U.S. I think we are just as guilty of harming our women and causing permanent damage, we just do it in a much more subtle way.

I would like to start dating again.

Or at least have a boy toy.

But, I don't really want to commit the time and the amazing amounts of effort it takes to find someone who doesn't make me want to gouge my eyes out and kick myself in the head.

Plus, I will only be here for another two months.

Plus, the last couple relationships ended because of moves or transfers not coming through, ect. I don't need that drama a third time.

But, I would really like a summer fling.

Dilemmas.

18 comments:

This Is Just Me said...

Wow. You are inspiring me. I have been wanting to pack up and move to follow a very unconvential studya and career path, but haven't had the guts yet. I'd love to start in January. Reading this post wants to make we want to just go ahead and do it.

GirlGoyle said...

Yikes tons going on! It's funny how at one point in our lives we all (well not all) contemplate doing things that may chance the world such as joining the peace corps. And then reality hits and you realize that at our age being poor gets old pretty quickly. So you end up disenchanted at a desk job that can eventually afford you car payments, rent, food and a few nights out with your friends. What to do?

Party Girl said...

just me: ah, shucks. I honestly, truly believe one person can change the world, or the world of one person.

GG: Although I absolutely agree with you, here's why I'm not so sure I will change my mind about the PC.
I've already done several years in Corp. America. I call those years, "My soul sucking years." I can never, nor will I ever, go back to work for a big, nameless corporation.
I've learned and realized what is important to me and what are truly essentials.
Material goods have lost a lot of their importance to me.
Clothes, art supplies, fresh water, food, shelter, a journal, a book or two, the ability to communicate with others. Really all I need.
I'm already poor, so really, where's the difference?
I don't have health insurance and I haven't had the benefit of health care for several years.
Therefore, I understand the difference between paying my bills and taking my meds and the frustration of needing to go the dr. vs. do I go to the dr. and then the embarrassment of repeatedly telling the desk clerk that I don't have insurance and then having to make payment arrangments for the next X months. Nice.
I cannot compare my "poor" to that of a third world poor. I don't go hungry, I have shelter, a loving family, and I don't live in fear; however, I know what it means to struggle.
I cannot compare my "stuggles" to those in war-torn or third world countries; however, perhaps "my struggles" and my life experiences will enable me to empathize with those who don't have many of the comforts that I have had the glorious fortune of having from living in the United States.

limpy99 said...

Re: Summer fling

I've got a brother.

Party Girl said...

Limpy: So is that for a fling or a boy toy?
Can he carry on a conversation?
I don't want to continue the eye gouging and kicking myself in the head.
It is starting to cause dents.
Me no likey the dents.

limpy99 said...

Like he'd care.

Actually, you two have a lot in common. Advanced degrees, both in your 30's, both broke, both love baseball, beer, travel etc. etc.

Suddenly I feel like Chuck Woolery.

Dirty Bunny said...

You're such a good writer. Maybe you could get a job that meshes that with shit-loads of travel. OOh, ooh, I know...you likey the alcohol too...maybe one of those people that visits inns and awesome spas and shit and then writes about them. You could be like Robin Leech, only far more attractive, witty, and interesting.

Party Girl said...

Limpy:
Does one of those ect. represent sex?
Let's see: he's in his 30's, single, no kids (assuming) smart, never married (assuming) educated, can carry on a conversation (assuming. I mean you're brothers, how far from the proverbial tree, ya know? Wait. I totally forgot about my family. I'm still going to assume.) likes baseball, travel, and most importantly beer!!!...he sounds perfectly marvelous.

One problem: Unless he lives in the Midwest, we live several hundred miles apart.
(Please let him live in the midwest. Please let him live in the midwest.



We'll be back in two and two.

Party Girl said...

Dirty bunny: #1 dream job (other than being a research and writer for Jeopardy!) (Did someone say, Dork?) Work for the Travel Channel and/or write for a travel magazine. I would SO, so, so very much love that.

P.S. Thanks for the compliment(s), hon. I very much appreciate all of them.

limpy99 said...

He lives in CT. He would move to either Alaska or Montana. Probably Germany too. None of which are in the midwest. But other than that, he'd be perfect.

limpy99 said...

And hey, if you don't follow up on that job idea from DB, let me know. I'll send in a resume.

ptg said...

Wow, your motivation astounds me. I am a slug compared to your awesomeness.
I think it's great that you can pick up and move and just start over like that, it really says something about your strength of character. (Which by the way, is balls.)
Anyway, just wanted to wish ya good luck on your interview - pretty sure you'll nail it. After all, how could you not with a name like PG?

Party Girl said...

Limpy:...and so it goes.

I've actually thought of moving to MT and AK. Germany. Well. It won't be to Frankfurt, let me put it that way. The aiport security owes me a cigarette after that pat down.

Wait, are you going to submit a resume for me or for you? If you could submit my resume for me, that would be awesome.

ptg: Wow. Color me blushin' I've never been told I was balls before. Me, likey.

Basically I know me. If I don't keep the train of exhaustion going, I will get off the tracks and not go back to school. It's been tough enough giving up the job with the big paycheck this go round, it will only get harder with time.
Plus, I'm single. I don't have to worry about anyone or ask anyone if it's okay for me to do something. (I'm not saying married folk have to ask, but if I want to move, I can just move. If I want to go somewhere, I can just go. Make sense?) I can come and go as I please.
Also, I've had to build-up to the move. I've had to think about it, sit on it, and contemplate it for sometime...then make the big leap.

Also, Mr. London and his get up and move to another continent, well, that opened my eyes to a lot. He doesn't know that, but it did and it has.

ptg said...

Definitely. It's good though that although you love and hate him, Mr. London has overall been a positive influence.

Can't wait to see pics on your trip during Thanksgiving...now that will be a cool trip!

limpy99 said...

I guess I could submit your resume to Jeopardy. I'm sure a one-time winner from 8 years ago has mega-pull there.

Tom Serafini, Actor to the Stars! said...

I personally would like to see the return of the naked party girl pics. Maybe.

Still not at all offended you came to NYC and didn't even sent me an email. No not at all. What, you think I'm strange or someteenk?

Party Girl said...

ptg: I do enjoy hearing from him...I just don't enjoy hearing how much fun he is having and how much he loves it there.

(sigh)

Limpy: You're such a stud! I would love just to say I tried out, let alone was on and won!

Tom: Dear Mr Actor Man, I suck. I know this. But it's in the very best way. I promise.

limpy99 said...

"Stud" ~snicker~ I'm pretty sure that if you lined up every previous Jeopardy winner who'd been accurately described as a stud, you'd have a graphic description of absolute zero.

Nonetheless, I think you can try out on-line these days. Worth a shot, and it's not like you won't travel for a couple of days.