Thursday, March 15, 2007

inner dork: all things St. Patrick

Yeah! A national reason to get really drunk and stupid! Whoo-hoo! Color me drunk!

Did you know:

St Patrick was born in Scotland or Wales around 370 A.D.

St Patrick's first name was: Maewyn. (I had no idea. I thought his first name was, Saint or Patrick, go figure.)

So, Maewyn was kidnapped (bummer) and sold into slavery in Ireland (bastards!) where he worked as a shepherd (baaaaah.) It was during this time he started to have his religious visions and dreams (I see dead people, I mean angels.) In one dream, he was shown a way to escape Ireland, (Hallelujah!) which was by going to the coast and getting on a ship (cause it's a coastal place that means it's surrounded by water.) After a perilous journey (do heroes and saints every have a non-perilous journey?) of hundreds of miles, he arrived at the coast and discovered a ship bound to Britain (hot damn! what are the chances?)

Back in Britain, Maewyn's dreams continued (well of course they did.) In one dream a man named Victoricus, came with letters from Ireland. In the dream Maewyn was asked to, "...come and walk among us once more." (I never hear things like that in my dreams. It's usually, something like, Hey, how you doin'?)

Although moved by the visions, he didn't feel so moved as to relocate to Ireland (the cost to benefit ratio wasn't really all that great.) So, Maewyn packed up his meager belongings and moved to France. There he entered the monastery and began studying under the priesthood. He changed his name to Patrick, which means, "Father of the people" in Latin. (I really think he changed his name because he finally realized how unfortunate it was to be named, Maewyn.)

Around 432 A.D. Patrick felt ready to move back to Ireland and spread the holy word of God and build churches and such places of worship. Because of Patrick's humility, winning personality, and knowledge of Ireland's social structure his mission was huge success. As a result of his success he made his headquarters in Armagh, which is present day Northern Ireland. By the time of his death on March 17 somewhere between 461 and 490 A.D. (wow, how vague. Not sure of the year, but we know the day? Hmmm, suspicious.) Ireland was almost entirely Christian thus making St. Patrick the patron saint of Ireland. Ta dah!

(And here I thought it has something to do with driving the snakes out of Ireland. See, I learn with all of you. It's a give and take relationship the Thursday inner dorkings.)


limpy99 said...

There never were any snakes native to Ireland. So St. Maewyn-oops-I-mean-Patrick never drove any out. Also, from what I've heard from people who have been there, St. Patirck's Day in Ireland is really more of a religious observance and not so much the roaring drunken pisser it is in the States.

Their loss.

Bre said...

it is a bit of a religious observance, but they certainly party it up after mass!

Heck, let's be honest - I've been partying since March 1st!

GirlGoyle said...

Where does all the drinking and having to wear green come in?? And how about the leprauchauns?? They must've been part of the visions he had. Or maybe he was having visions of little green men because good old St. P had a drinking problem?

puerileuwaite said...

This is all a little too "Lord of the Rings" -ish for me. Do you have any anecdotes that are more reminiscent of "Harry Potter"?

Phollower said...

All I know is that a "Thursday inner-dorking" sounds like it should involve a whole lot more doing it that it does.

Wait, maybe that's an inner-doinking. Or inner-porking. Either way, I was hoping for something else.