Several years ago I had a fabulously naughty little one night stand. I met Mr. One Night at an after hours party and then continued the party on our own late into the next morning. The night was conducted at the apartment of Mr. One Nights best friend, more specifically on the best friends bed. The best friend and Billy had left the apartment to go do their own little getaway. It took about .001 of a second between the door closing behind Billy and the best friend to the Mr. One Night and I going at each other. Cause, I'm just like that.
An hour or so later the door opened. It was an efficiency apartment so that would be the door to the living room, bedroom, main door, entryway that was being opened. The best friend said something to the effect of, "WHOA!" when he saw the shadow of me with my ankles wrapped around my head and quickly went out the door to wait in the hallway...so we could finish. Cause he was polite like that. For the next several minutes I heard Billy yelling, "Have you cum, yet!!!" "Jesus, aren't you finished" and "Hurry the hell up!" all being screamed at me from the hallway of the apartment building. Cause Billy is like that. To which I replied with, "Yes, I've already cum and no I'm not finished and if you'd shut the hell up I could cum again!!"..all said with love and tenderness and a slight accent of drunk.
So, we finished, and I beckoned Billy and the best friend back into the apartment and as the sun was rising, I went home.
Several years later:
I'm conducting an interview and who should be sitting across the table from me? The best friend, a.k.a the guy whose bed I had sex on and who saw me in the most compromising of positions. You know, the one where my ankles were behind my head. I'm conducting the interview as I would any other, but all I can think of is: you've seen me naked. You've seen me naked. All the while wondering if he was thinking: I've seen you naked, I've seen you naked. You had sex on my bed. See, I couldn't pick the guy who I had the one night with out of a one person line-up, but the best friend, well, he pops into my life randomly every couple of years starting about 15 years ago, to today. I never know if he remembers me and since I never know if he remembers me I do the polite thing and pretend I don't know him.
So, I did the only thing any respectable party girl would do, I hired him. So, I will wonder if he remembers me and is picturing me with my ankles behind my head every time I see him, which is every single day.
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9 comments:
Yeah, that thing you keep wondering about, the one where if he's remembering you naked with your ankles around your head? The answer's yes.
Hell, I'M remembering it and I wasn't even there!
Yeah, but NOW you're in a position of authority!
Wait... 15 yrs ago? You were getting drunk and getting banged with your ankles around your head when you were 16? Is "How many orgasms have you had in one session?" one of those questions you will never answer?
Limpy: That's the kind of answer I like to hear.
P: ...and I use it.
In many different ways.
Trapped: Yep, lost my virginity at 16. "Lost" isn't really the right word. More like, got rid of.
I first ran into the best friend during my first year of college when I was 18.
How many orgasms in one sexcapade? Well over 100.
...and no. That isn't an exaggeration.
..and no, that wasn't the exception. That is an easy rule to follow and live by.
I'll bet that "comment deleted" was "ULP"
my, duh, moment of the day: what is "ulp?"
Would it be weird to suggest you get dangly earrings that look like tiny little legs?
Joe: I dunno. Is it weird that I already own a pair?
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