Tuesday, February 21, 2006

question of the week: toys

This is something I've wondered about and wanted to write about for awhile now, toys.

Toys in terms of; men do you ever feel jealous, intimidated by, envious of, nervous when they are brought out/up, shown to you?

Women, how do you feel about your toys and using them during sex?

Here's where I'm going with this.

I've wondered when I'm with my man if he is secretly sweating and I've wondered about the thoughts going through his head from the moment it's mentioned of, "hey, let's break out the toys for the first time" to the time I actually take one out of the toy box. Is he wondering how big it's going to be? How he's going to compare to the toy? What if I break out something that's bigger than he is, then what?

I've had men thank me for not having toys that are bigger than they are. I read that as a sign of, "thanks for not making me feel inadequate."
Sure no problem.
Here's the thing. Your not. I've said it before, but if you missed it I'll say it again: the average penis for white males is: 5 3/4 inches.
5 inches if magnificent.
6 inches is fabulous.
7 inches if wonderful.
8 inches is great.
9 inches is too big.
10 inches I will only want to pet you. Too big for me. Thanks for trying though.
Over 10, wow, nice to see, but I'm a little scared and intimidated and have no desire to be in pain and walk funny for the next several days.

Are there size queens? Sure. However, I've never been in love with a cock. I've been in love with the man who was attatched to the cock. Therefore, it doesn't matter what the size of his cock is, it's about the person attatched to it that I care about and that matters to me.

Therefore, my toys are no more than 7 inches.
Most are 6.
All are wonderful and you all know they get used. A lot. (probably a little too much right now) (focus on the post, not on the toy box) (keep concentration on the post)(hey, get your mind back on the post) (forget about the throb)

I've never chosen a dildo over a man. I have dated a few men who were dildos, but that's for another day.

Have you ever gotten jealous of the vibrator/dildo? Like, "hey, what about me? Can I get in on that action?"

Orgasms? Are they better with the toy than with a real cock? No.
Are they different? Ah, yeah. If I have several areas being stimulated at once, sorry the orgasms are going to be different and probably stronger and wet, wild, loud and who knows what else. (Again, several things are being stimulated at once. The same would be true for you as well.) As much as I love cock I've never seen a man that has two of them. (ok, well that's not true. I have actually. I even have a picture. I'll share it sometime) However, the point is, if you want to dp me, it takes two. (hence the 'double' part of that word) But again, I would never choose plastic or glass over warm flesh and blood with a man attatched at the other end.

Do you get off using the toys on her as much as she gets off having them used on her? Women, do you get off having them used on you during sex?
I've had men who have absoultely loved the vibrations. If I'm stimulating my clit, then you can feel it when your inside me. (super extra bonus for both involved)

On a side note: True story: I've known of seveal women who used the vibrator a little too frequently and couldn't have an orgasm for several months when it came to the real thing. They were too used to the 'vibration' part of the vibrator. So, if nothing else you can warn her that that might happen.
(That's why I use dildos or I don't put batteries in the vib. One, I find it too distracting. Two, as much as I love men, I've never found one who vibrates. Three, do you know how many batteries I would go through in a month? I would need to buy stock in Energizer.

(I'm sure some of you will say, "Hey great post there PG, but I ain't responding." Okay, I get this, but the whole (whole) point of this blog is to get info out there and to have an open and honest conversation about things like this, so.....)

(oh, and if you respond I'll kick the HNT pics up a notch and I'll make the sexcapades more vivid. Just sayin') (it's up to you.) (you don't want to disappoint a girl now do you?) (looks at you with big brown doe eyes and tilts head)


Will said...


Casper said...

...as much as I love men, I've never found one who vibrates.

You need to meet more men going through withdrawl.

Party Girl said...

will: I'm hoping against hope for comments.

I promise they'll be some nakedness on Thursday if someone actually comments on the actual topic question.

Party Girl said...

casper: excellent point

MrHinge said...

"Kick up the HNT a notch"

That sounds like it's supposed to be a bride.

Kilt Trip said...

Hehe...toys don't intimidate. They can be fun in most circumstances. Although, being a guy that falls into your "wonderful/great" category, I do sweat it a little when the toy broken out is as thick as my neck and 14" long.

eleKtrofly said...

yeah... that could be discomforting for a woman to pull out a ten-inch toy and say "I'll take it from here..."

but i'm glad you are honest about the size issue. so many men are obsessed with getting a bigger dick, but when it's too big, a lot of women can't take it, so whats the point. I have had that problem before and it sucks...

eleKtrofly said...

but i'm totally down with toys if it helps her get off ;)

Party Girl said...

MrHinge: me bribe? Never. Never ever. (maybe once or twice) (ok, just this once)

Party Girl said...

rob: excellent, and I as a female would gulp if a 14 inch anything was pulled out in front of me.

elektrofly: I can deep throat, but only to a point. Fucking a huge cock, it's going to hurt to ride it all the way...I would have to think having a huge cock for a guy would have to suck, pun not intended, I mean not many woman could handle it, so yeah...

I'm sure some woman might disagree with me..feel free to.

Jay said...

Hmmm... have I ever felt jealous, intimidated by, envious of, or have been nervous as a result of a woman bringing out/up or showing me a sex toy?

Uh, no.

Come up with any toy you can think of, you're not going to replace me. I have encountered women in my life who have beaten down lesser men's egos claiming they were replacable by plastic and "C" batteries. They're full of shit, period. Yes, there are toys out there that for me to try and keep up would require four hands and a plunger. But let me ask you this; can any of your toys nibble gently the nape of your neck, sending shivers down your spine? Can a dildo whisper into your ear while thrusting deeply inside of you, driving you wild with lust? Can anything you own give you a full body massage while softly kissing and licking down your spine, with you so overcome with lust and excitment that you cry out, "FUCK ME NOW!!!"?

Yeah, I'm replacable alright.

Casper said...

This whole question reminds me of a line I've had to repeat many times...

When she said she couldn't take more than six inches, I had to fold it in half.

Sorry...couldn't resist. And it brought up bad memories.

Party Girl said...

jay: that was my entire point with, "I would never choose plastic or glass over warm flesh and blood."

I will take the man every time for the reasons you stated and for many, many more.

(licking and kissing down her spine? That was just mean. A mean, mean visual.)

Casper: funny, and quite the visual of a cock being folder in two.

Ho-Me-G said...

Great post, well written.

My chief concern would be a growing addiction to them - i.e., HAS to have a vibrator. I met one woman like that once. I don't know if she just had a hard time cumming in the first place or not, but vibrator was her rule. Not sexy.

Like Jay (well done, Jay!) I think toys are hors d'oevres, but not the main course. Or at least in the context of a relationship.

Would I be intimidated by the size of her toys? Only if she kept asking for "Hank," her 12-inch dildo in our sex. Then I would think that I'm not really enough to satisfy her. In which case, I would promptly help her in her search for a real live Hank, and move on.