Friday, January 06, 2006

current distractions

That's what we're looking for, a distraction. It can be a person, place or thing, but that's what we are all looking for. Something or someone to get our mind off something or someone.

How do we get over our last boyfriend, fuck buddy? Lover? We find a new one and ta dah! The distraction is now no longer (or at least not as prevalent) in our thoughts and thank god for that because my god I am so tired of my first thought and my last being about Mr. X (or Miss X) You know the feeling, the thought process. You meet someone and as soon as they start creeping into your thoughts they become your last thought of the night, your thought in the middle of the night when your rolling over and then your first thought when you wake-up and before your feet have even swung from the bed to hit the floor boom! there they are in your head. Not to mention how they creep in your thoughts while your taking a shower, getting dressed, driving to and fro and during that all-important meeting. They are everywhere and it awesome! You have a wonderful secret grin on your face at all times.
Then, for whatever reason they are no longer part of your life. You are no longer a 'we,' yet they still pervade your thoughts. Every little thought. Make them go away make them go away. I don't want to think about them any more....make them go away....

Then you meet a new distraction, because isn't that what we all are? And I mean this in the best sense; we are all distractions to someone or to ourselves. Your friends? Distractions from ourselves and our lives. We want to know about them and their lives and what we have things in common.
Alcohol? A fun distraction.
One night stands? A meaningless never to be seen again, distraction.
Five chocolate chip cookies? A distraction from fixing a real meal.
Porn? A distraction from what we are not having.
Your next boyfriend or girlfriend? A distraction from the last boyfriend or girlfriend and a distraction from your life, and it's fabulous!
You are now no longer thinking of Mr. or Miss X any more and it's wonderful because isn't this what you wanted? Yes, yes it is! Thank you for no longer being in my every waking thought and sometimes in my dreams as well.
But, it's sad too. You're losing them. It's a potent cocktail of sadness, regret and happiness. You've moved on.

4 comments:

Intense said...

I have read this over and over....I hate it and love it at the same time. We are all dealing with this issue on a daily basis. It sickens me how much time it can consume my thoughts.

The worst is when our new distraction aren't even worth it. Again, why does life have to be so damn difficult on the mind?

B/c of that potent cocktail is it really moving on?

Ho-Me-G said...

Hmm... good post, but I have a different take.

I don't think it's completely distraction. I mean, alocohol is a distraction, to be sure. One night stands are a bandaid for temporary relief. I agree with you here.

I think instead that it depends on your focus. You're in school not for distraction but because you have a vision of something more of yourself and school works for that.

You exercise, not for distraction but to improve yourself. Because it helps you to feel better.

Hopefully, it's the same thing with choosing someone. You choose them not because it's distraction from previous hurt but because it's a view of how that person betters you and helps you toward your goals.

I think this is a good knife by which to cut the fat of life from the meat. Distraction or betterment?

AeroAangel said...

well said...very nice.

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