So I was having a poopy day yesterday and I needed to relax, so I masturbated for 52 minutes last night.
I got out a couple of toys and just went to town. 52 minutes later and oh, I don't know about 211 orgasms later I was feeling much better. I'm not really making up that number either. Either one. In-fact while I was in the midst of my relaxation session I thought, "it's a wonder I have never thrown my neck or back out." and then I went about my business. it was only when my clit was about burned off from my clit stimulator and I was giggling because I had cum so many times that I felt I was well relaxed and called it a night.
Seriously, not knocking anyone out there because all women are different and maybe your one is better than my 211, but when a women tells me she had three orgasms and it was the best ever I think silently to myself, "really? Just three?" Now I certainly wouldn't be complaining, but if I can't get into the double figures, seriously into the double figures, then I am having an off night. (so to speak)
But, this whole masturbation session got me thinking. I first discovered masturbating when I was about nine. My mom had had the whole sex talk with me and I was confused as hell and got nothing more from it other than I would be starting my period soon. I was scared to death that I was going to start my period at school and what do you know, I did. But, that's a subject for another day, back to masturbating. It wasn't until my parents were watching the movie, "The Big Chill" that I was like, "OHhhh, now I get it." I have no idea what scene or what about the movie made me think this, and I have not seen the movie since that fateful night to figure it all out but, I promptly went and took a bath and there in discovered how good I could make myself feel and from there on out I spent a lot of time taking long hot baths and long hot showers. (or until the water went cold, but sometimes that didn't even matter. As a matter of fact sometimes I wanted an ice cold shower because that is a whole different sensation.
This lead into another thought, any women who says she doesn't masturbate is a down and out liar. She is a liar. Everyone knows she is a liar. I've had male friends thank me for being honest about the fact that I masturbate. (well, your welcome. Didn't know it was a big secret) If a girl says she doesn't have a vibrator or a dildo then she is a liar or she desperately wants one. (me? I have several. Several. A couple boxes worth. A girl needs variety. when it comes to toys that is)
A girlfriend of mine, who is a nurse and the mother of two, told me she never masturbated. When I called her a liar she said, "no, honest. I think it's gross." Wow, to think of yourself as gross? To not know what turns you on and what buttons to push and how far to push them. To hear the sounds that you can make. If you don't know this, then how in the hell is the person you're with supposed to know what turns you on? I am going to grab my mans hands and say, "feel that? Feel that right there? ok, keep your fingers just like that."...and then it goes from there. How do I know what I like? Because I spend nights relaxing. Anywhere from 5 minutes to 3 hours, just relaxing. With myself. All alone. I can be in my bedroom in the dark or in my living room watching the news, or porn, or a documentary, or a McDonald's commercial. The job might take longer, but I can get it accomplished with no problem.
So, here's my question for all of you. When did you first "discover" masturbating and what did you think was going on? Men, did you think you broke something (if you came) and girls how long can you go for?
I think this, true confessions, is going to be a weekly post as well. I have a lot of things to confess.
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
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15 comments:
no, we're not all liars...i never masturbated...not once, until i was 20, it just never occurred to me...finally i got tired of everybody (after much debate) finally believing me and then inevitably following it with...well, why not? and i don't own any vibrating toys or other sexual devices, except handcuffs (but those are for others).
I was definitely a late bloomer on this one...I'd say 25 probably. I do own sex toys...a must for a single woman!!!
aeroaangel: you're right, not all women are liars when they say this, but I have to think, "really? you're not even curious?"
and I say run out and buy a toy. Toys aren't just for kids.
Rob: ah, the long showers. I remember when my younger brother reached puberty and was taking the longest showers and I would comment to my mom, "jesus, what is he doing in there?!" (obviously not thinking) and my mom would comment back, "the same thing you did when you were his age."
my mom is so awesome.
Schoolhouse: yes, toys are a must for us single gals.
This is an awesome post. I too was around that 10 or 11 year age. Having the disfunctional childhood that I had. I had porn at my disposal pretty early on. After seeing the infamous money shot a few times I was curious to know if I could do it to. In the living room during summer break I taught my self how to be the "Master of my own Domain."
MrHinge: you put a smile on my face. Ah, the masters of our domains, that was the refernce I was searching for a week ago. And I remember the summers I spent "reading" in my bedroom. Ah, childhood.
yeah, then there's me...who actually was reading in my room, and actually washing my hair in the shower...just didn't know what i was missing back then...it just never occurred to me...lol. and i don't feel i need toys when the real thing is so readily available...hehe.
I have been flicking my bean since 11. It was a remedy against all troubles in life. It still is. I am single, 39 now. My vibrators make me crazy sometimes. I am not able to stop buzzing my clit until it is almost numb.
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I started when i was almost too young to get it up. But it didnt get serious till 15 when i met an honest girl like you who got me to admit to her i masturbated. By the end of that phone call we had both masturbated and began having phone sex at least 1nc a week for the next 4 years. We never dated, never had sex, just talked, masturbated and had fun. We are still great friends...
Ps it is a big deal for me to find a girl whos honest about her sexuality because so few are. Also and i dont know why but a sexy girl getting herself off is a whole different kind of sexy.
Nice! Love hearing about girls masturbating
After thinking for a while, I'd thought it's about time I tell a few of my story. I was about nine when I had this friend, her name was April, and we were best friends since the age 4. So one day when she had come over, my baby sitter was having a shower and knowing her showers were long, April asked me, "since your baby sitter takes long, let's play a fun game" and I was in agreement for a little fun, but little did I know, it was more than usual fun. She suggested we play husband and wife. Again, I agreed. April was the husband and I was the wife, so the scene we acted was that I was at home, taking care of my baby doll, and it was about time she came home from 'work'. Surprisingly, she approached me and kissed me gently on my lips. "What are you doing?" I asked, shocked. "I'm your husband, remember?" She only smiled, and I brushed it off. When I put my baby doll in her bed, april came up to me and quickly pulled my shorts down. Innocent little me, I bent to pick them up in embarrassment. "What are you doing again? It's not funny" I complained. "I found this video on my brother's laptop of a married couple and it looked so fun, let's do it" She smiled and I felt confused. "What were they doing?" "I'll show you." I only nodded and she explained that I have to take my pants off, along with my underwear. She made me lay down on the bed, then bent down and started licking my clit. I felt overwhelmed by the enjoyable feeling her wandering tongue had given me, and I begun begging her to keep going. Her tiny fingers felt huge as she pumped them into me, and as her tongue swivled around my parts, my legs were shaking and I felt over powered as the most intense wave of excitment passed through me, my back arched as she pressed her lips harder and I finally let loose, my body releasing. I peed as the feeling exploded and April only laughed, telling me this had also happened in the video she had watched. She then took off her pants and told me this was different than we just did, but I didn't care, I wanted to have more fun. She stood between my legs, and held a position where she turned round my waist, so that her warm genitals pressed to mine. She begun rubbing herself against me, beginning slow but then going wild as ever. The bed was shaking a little, and again, we both peed this time. She begun kissing my lips, and approaching my hand to her area. She instructed me to rub her, and myself at the same time, only to lead ourselves into another rocking orgasm. We both didn't know what we were doing but we did know it felt amazing. A year later, April had moved far away and we no longer connected, so I led myself to masturbating to porn. I would use the shower head to aim at my clit, and use my mom's vibrating tooth brush against my clit too. I couldn't dare to use something into my vagina but I masturbate every day on regular basis, the image of april's lips sucking at my clit, and the sensation would wash over me again, just as the first time, but only better. I now heard April's a lesbian and I could only wish to have her back, to make me feel the pleasure I longed to feel again. This is my story, It isn't fake and I don't want people thinking it's fake because it's unique and so unreal. But it is, and I am incredibly lucky to have experienced this.
You are so fucking lucky to what you experienced, I just masturbated and squirted a couple times to the image of you and april rocking against each other. My penis is standing straight to your words, and I wanted it deep inside you sexy ladies. Fuck, I'm so horny.
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I'm calling BS. Nice fictional story though.
I first heard about it on school excursion overnight at about 10. in bunk room one guy suggested we all rub ourselves. His older brother did and white stuff came out. Felt nice but didn't do it regularly. Then about 14 saw guy holding a funnel in front of groin and fake wanking the thin bit as a joke. Suddenly though - hmm - should give that a go at home. From then on it was constant. I found a pile of about 40 porn mags near my home on day. Playboy/ penthouse/ hustler. That was it for the next I don't know how many years. As had a twin brother and shared a room the only privacy I had at home was in the toilet and used to disappear in there for hours and I think became a family joke. In 40 yrs of masturbating I think the longest I've gone without is about 2 weeks. At the moment (55) I probably do it about 3 time a week. I wear cock rings often during the day - all day - makes me hornier. I had a PA piecing about 3 years ago and I often combine sounding with my masturbation. I have seveal thickness of rubber sounding rods I can wear attached to my PA piercing so I can masturbate and cum while still wearing them. I love playing with myself - gets rid of stress and helps me sleep.
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